the kid is still fighting

continues to whine about writing but not writing at all /shrug emoji


work takes and takes and takes and i think keeping my head down and just doing my part isn't enough when you get pulled into cleaning after people time after time. if these people were malicious, it might be easier to say no, but if they are genuinely just not good at it, then where are we at. i just want everyone to be competent. i just want the best for everyone so i get some slack, like seriously, i can only help these people out so much.

parents are talking about us, sibs buying a place and my god, am i really old enough to be thinking mortgage and taxes and RRSPs??? it feels surreal but my goal of paying off the sis's student loans doesn't seem unattainable?? and that is also surreal? this coupled with the fact that i really have no monetary concepts over anything makes this extra ridic in my eyes.

and i still don't know what i want more, a change or this state of content in my mediocrity.

this kid is still fighting, tooth and nail, this mundane life.