Avengers (2012)

Title: Avengers

Release: The anticipated 2012!

Summary:

A rag-tag team of unlikely heroes come together to battle an army not of this world.

The above can also be read as: a brainless-plotless superheroes film with great looking guys fighting ugly aliens in semi-ridiculous costumes while ridiculously UST-ing all over the place at the same time. (Also known as a mash-up of everything the film industry can get of Marvel’s numerous babies.)

Commentary:

I came out with unexpected feelings, no memory of plot and a cramp in my arm because my face is not made for 3D glasses (I don’t have a Lady Gaga nose) so I had to spend the entire time propping those damn things up so I could watch the film. And because Avengers is a character-galore of a film, have a character-specific commentary (aka fangirl rant.)

Captain America: He is surprisingly well adjusted for a nearing 100 years old senior man with the beefiest muscles around. He is still prancing around wrapped in an American flag and what can I say besides: GIVE ME BUCKY (so the two of them can get on one motorcycle and tour America like Erik and Charles did.)

Ironman: Tony and Pepper were completely sweet-sweet all over the place. Thank the lords I love Pepper just as much as Tony, otherwise I might just gag hetero rainbows.

Thor: I think he has no brain cells and run on pure I-love-my-little-brother feelings when I first watched Thor and thought nothing more. After Avengers, however, my feelings for him spiked and I walked out of the theatre gushing and wanting to scream NII-SANNNN out in the air. I don’t know why and what but that one line of: come home just gave me all the feels.

Loki: Tsun-tsun-tsundere, love. He just needs a hug and some late night snuggles and I am sure he’ll be fine or at least not bent out on destroying the world in the name of my-daddy-loves-my-brother-more. But gah, as much as I don’t have a tsundere-complex, he is moe. And he looks just ravishing in a long coat and scarf with his hair slick back like that. (Yes, yes, yes and thank you.)

Hulk: Adorkable. Just dorky in all the right ways but still angry enough to pull off the greenman’s ultimate HULK SMASH! Despite the instant switch from destroy-everything-in-my-path-I-don’t-care-you’re-my-mom to I’ll-godzilla-for-my-team-let’s-be-temporary-best-friends I still think he is great. (Even though I am a huge Edward Norton fan, Mark Ruffalo you win all my Hulk-lovin’-heart.)

Hawkeye: I just thought he was there. I mean he had a relatively large part but it was just there, you know, it didn’t stand out as well as I thought it would but meh, I guess I don’t have much of a taste for archers XD

Black Widow: Just, uh, let me drool over Scarlett Johanson’s body first will you? Because damn, she’s got a banging body. I really liked her entrance, because it was witty and quirky and it had her tied to a chair speaking Russian in a tanktop. (Enough said, really!)

Nick Fury: I wished he were more kickass. But understandably, this film had too much characters to give each of them an opportunity to show off their awesome.

Minor characters: There were more than enough and some, surprisingly, became more than important… read as spoilers. :P

Overall, the film was a great pre-summer blockbuster but I might be biased because it is obvious I have taken a liking to anything Marvel comics and I say yes to anything with brainless violence and tons of ikemen, or just men in general really, because I am not picky either.